The morning after the budget is a very dark one indeed. Living in a council estate - everyone will be badly affected around me. Although our houses were finished in 2002, they have only one fireplace for heat and warm water, the insulation is just above non-existing, the state of doors, windows, the amount of gaps and cracks and the overall use of substandard material has left these houses prone to drafts and leaks and any improvement of these conditions has to be financed by us, the tenants. There won’t be much improvement for some time to come. Many of my neighbours have young children and if I ever thought that bringing up my son as a single parent was hard, I would need to seriously reconsider such conclusion. Ireland today is neither the place nor the time to bring up children or into this world. The hardship put upon families evokes images and in some memories of times long gone. Each generation tries to improve themselves and to provide a better future for their children. Now it seems that all we have done created floods and draughts while keeping the few powerful safe and sound during our very short-lived illusion of betterment.

I will see if it possible to organise shopping trips to Derry to share the cost of petrol and to get a weekly supply of daily items which are cheaper across the border. I have no doubt in my mind that many will do the same. As a result the government will not be able to squeeze the expected amount of money from its ill-conceived attempt and unable to take money from the rich and its own over-bulging apparatus, matter will worsen and it will become a question of time, when fundamental changes have to occur. Irish endurance of not enough to live and too much to die poverty may not what it used to be.

Here comes my first rough calculation of my own financial situation:

Single parent, one child in third level education

Income:

Outgoings

Weekly income: € 244.81

Weekly outgoings: € 112.85

Leaving me with € 131.96 so far. TV license, road tax, car insurance, heating costs and petrol are not included. All on the increase and there is more to come. I belief it would give me a very optimistically € 80 for daily items per week, which means a daily spending spree of around € 11.43. From it I also would need to save € 1500 for my sons registration fee for next years course. Supporting him financially with even a very small supplement per week or month is out of the question, leaving him fending for himself. There is no scope for a much needed dentist appointment nor at the hairdresser, never mind such fancy things like birthdays or christmas.

With no disposable income around and people holding tight on to the little money left, there is no hope of generating additional income in some other way for myself and I can only hope to stay in employment.

It is of no comfort nor assistance to be informed that we all have to bleed, when obviously some are left bleeding out while others barely trickle. Worryingly, the latter made us pay all along, so they don’t have to, even for their mistakes and their greed.

Even after closer examination women don’t seem to have played a significant role in the history of Grianán of Aileach. Yet nine names, three queens and six goddesses, representing the land, sovereignty, fertility, war, death and great influence, are found surrounding events at the time of the legendary Tuatha De Dannan near Ulster and Aileach. And none of them was ordinary.

“Eriu, though it should reach a road-end, Banba, Fotla, and Fea, Neman of ingenious versicles, Danann, mother of the gods. Badb and Macha, greatness of wealth, Morrigu – springs of craftiness, sources of bitter fighting were the three daughters of Ernmas.”

Eriu, Banba and Fotla were queens and wives to three grandsons of the Dagda, who according to legend built Grianán of Aileach to grieve for his son Aed. Eriu was wife to Cethor – Mac Greine, son of the sun; Banba to Sethor – Mac Cuill, son of the hazel and Fotla to Tethor – Mac Cecht, son of the ploughshare. “Badb, Macha, and Morrigu were their three goddesses. And “Fea (Badb) and Nemaind (battle goddesses) were the two wives of Net, a quo Ailech Neit.” As the Tuatha De Dannan came to Ireland in a blaze of “dark clouds“, they, like invaders before and after them, faced a respectable amount of defiance from the already established population. In both battles of Mag Tuired between the Tuatha De Dannan and the Fir Bolg, who allied with the Formorians (stronghold at Tory Island, Co. Donegal), “the Badb, and Macha, and Morrigu “ supported the De Danann in their pursuit. Although victorious in the end for the people of the Danann, it was short lived. As Ith, the Scythian, came to Ireland, he found Mac Greine, Mac Cuill and Mac Cecht at Aileach Neit (one of the many names ascribed to Grianán of Aileach) “contending with one another about the valuables of their ancestors”. Suspicious of his praise for the land they decided to kill him to prevent invasion and Ith received his lethal blow in a plain between Grianán and Raphoe. As a result the sons of Iths brother Mil mounted the dreaded invasion to avenge his death. At their arrival each of the three queens took the invaders aside and claimed that this land was named after her and so shall remain the principle name. After everything else failed to drive the Milesians back into the sea, it came to the final battle of Taillte where “Net son of Indui and his two wives, Badb (Fea) and Neman without deceit, were slain in Ailech without blame by Nemtuir the Red, of the Fomoraig”; “Eriu yonder, (fell) at the hands of Suirge”, Fotla at the hands of Etan with pride, of Caicher, Banba with victory”. Dananns reign finished this very day as her followers lost against the Milesians, who would have brought with them besides tools and skills their own deities. Although queens and goddesses they all fell by the hands of old foes and new arrivals. Their deaths did not just put an end to their individual life, legendary or otherwise, it marked the end of an era. In their presented forms these women symbolise each a fading aspect of the trinity of the Great Goddess: Mother of all gods – heaven and humans – earth and protectoress of the dead – underworld. An echo from the beginning of human civilisation and the cycle of birth, life, death and rebirth. Elements which would be absorbed into all changes afterwards.

In the legends of the British Isles Morrigian (Morrigu) always resides in and around water and “in the west where the sun sets”. Standing at Grianán, that would be beyond Lough Swilly where the last red rays of light are channelled through its bay, leaving the hill gently; only to rise again the next day beyond Lough Foyle. And so it begins again.

The devouring grasp of a from dust to diamond in ten years people is closing in, unquestioned, with not a thought to spare and for good. What would have been worth keeping, what would have been essential to keep, to maintain at least some of the illusion that pieces of the chronicle of the Irish people could be found in Ireland, true touchable traces, breathtaking skills, an unbroken spirit – is going, going, gone. The last unspoilt bastions of grandeur, coherency and dignity are photographed for use in later advertisements. When the original is no more descendants of emigrants will build their own, painstakingly but nevertheless wishful thinking version abroad. And the RTE archives will get more than just a good dusting. The hunt will be on for every last bit of footage of the disposable past for window dressing. Still trying to make a few quit from the dead horse. An apprehended goose chase for images to invite visitors although one is already hard pressed, finding those green, green fields and hills, sloping in on you just for laughs, mounted by skies; you’ve never seen before and drenched, down to its last grain, in events yet fully to be discovered.Grianan is rebuilt to collapse, so that one fine day it will be considered to be unfeasible to restore such a fragile monument for much longer. One lucky developer and Fianna Fail supporter will get the land, since it has been already acquired and put into the care of the state by the Land Commission decades ago. My guess is that they build hotel number two in the shape of Grianan Aileach. One is already on the foot of the hill. However I can not help but wonder, how feasible that could be in the long run with visitor numbers dwindling, since what they came for to see and was used to lure them in, is just not there anymore. Remembering the miserable summers far too well we had for the last years, I would be also quietly confident, that the weather is no keeper either. I can not see anyone coming here never mind staying for a week or two, if every last, possible spot is covered with un-telling new builds, you still would find annoying in warm sunshine because heritage and tradition was promised in the brochure and you could have saved yourself the trip and money by just stepping outside your own front door. And as far as Buncrana is concerned, building a shopping centre on the shore front with the exact ingredients you find everywhere else in a town with a very long standing tradition of going to Derry for this purpose can not be seriously considered as visitor attraction.At the moment, everything what is in the way of even a chance of an indecent amount of money making has to go. Buildings and sites of historic interest drop like flies. Irreparable damage has been already done to the unique complex of the Tara Valley to force an out of time and tolled motorway through. A survey for County Donegal concluded that in ten to fifteen years time there won’t be anymore remains of the past or historic sites left to visit, including Grianan Aileach. I have no doubt, the situation is similar across the country. Ireland severs all links to its past and it is not even for an explainable attempt for negative attention.The future looks grim.